My day

So my husband is gone. He left this morning. Let me rephrase that since I am making it sound like he left me like for good, which he did not. He went on deployment. So with that being said I can now explain why I was having such a pissy week awhile ago.

See Chris wasn't supposed to go out to sea for some time, but he came home and said "I have bad news" which involved them moving up the date of deployment and giving us no time to prepare or even really react. On top of that, our pay is still screwed up and I fear while he is gone it wont get fixed and he worked lots of hours. This on top of everything else small going on and it made for our crappy week.

I'm over the crappy week and walking around thinking Chris will still come home for dinner tonight, which he wont. This lasts a few days, sometimes a week before it really sets in that he is gone. So here are the days I become like a single mom, being the mommy and the daddy all in one. Trying to capture lots of pictures and video so when Chris comes home he gets a glimpse of life while he was gone.

Oh, and I forgot to mention that we were going to go to the Navy ball next weekend. I had the dress and everything, his dress blues were ready to go and I was so excited. We had a babysitter and everything. See Ive never been to a Submarine or Navy ball because he has always been deployed or had duty, and this time I guess is no exception. So yeah that didn't make things much better with the news, but I said I was done with my crappy week discussion and this time I promise I am.

The weather here sucks, its cold and rainy and windy and calls for that extra blanket on the bed. It seems to be reflecting my current mood with Chris leaving. Usually I love fall, the leaves falling, especially around here its beautiful, but the wind and the rain make it kind of enjoyable.

I'm jumping around allot, I know...but I don't care, not really anyways.

As I am typing this there is a workmen painting my exterior door, which is the main door in and out of the house. Why are they painting my White door that isn't meant to be painted, its that aluminum material and it looked fine before. Oh, and they are painting it Green. So I have an Orange house (well it could be called a brown I guess) with yellow trim and a green door. Lovely. And where is my notice? shouldn't I get a notice when they will be painting? Now I have to watch for Jordan and tell him not to touch the wet green door when he gets home from school. Yes, I love living in housing, itself alone could produce many stories. And did I mention they are very loud when they are painting? I think its time to turn up the music and tune them out.

So my mom is convinced Hannah has something other then short Anagen syndrome. She thinks its a vitamin deficiency. Which I must admit it could be and we have her on vitamins to help if that is the case, and trust me I would love to believe that in every way. I would love to believe her hair is growing at a slower rate, and it will come in suddenly very soon, but Ive been believing that for many years now (well since she was born) and so far nothing has happened. Though I am not sitting down and giving up, I have spent much money on shampoos and conditioners that are supposed to help the hair shaft, I have bought vitamins with Iron and much more with the small hope it will work. You have no idea how sick I am of people calling her a boy when she is in pink or wearing a dress. People who think she has cancer or others who think she is 2 when she really is almost 4 1/2. Its heart breaking for me. Every time I see a little girl around Hannah's age with a head full of hair I start to cry, I don't in public, I hold it back and tell myself how lucky I am that she is healthy and happy and that is all that matters, but I still want her to have hair. I talked to a girl who has loose anagen syndrome and she was telling me in High school she was teased horribly, and I really don't want Hannah to go threw that. High school is hard enough without giving people a reason to tease. Even if she had a wig I worry someone might know and pull it off for laughs. I know, I need to stop worrying. The thing about Hannah's syndrome is really the dermatologist didn't know much about it because its a newer thing, which means in all reality she could outgrow it in time. So I need to take this one day at a time, but when your a stresser like me who worries about everything, that's kind of hard, but I'm going to try it at least.

What a bunch of fun Ive been in this post, sorry I'm such a downer today, but I'm not going to be upbeat and perky when I don't feel it.